(25) ECLIPSING

Total eclipse of the moon in Australia last Tuesday night...(story later)

There is more eclipsing than just the moon.


We feel that mum's condition is definitely deteriorating and I'd like to prepare everyone for the eventuality. I noticed a lot more headaches, dizzy spells over the last week and on Saturday (whilst I was away taking a short break) Loretta and mum went through what they thought was going to be the end. Fortunately, Loretta called in the Palliative Care Nurse from Eastern Palliative Care (a fantastic support for us), and the nurse gave mum an injection. She came through her ordeal. I won't go into details here, but from all accounts, it was not pleasant. Mum stayed on the couch yesterday all day.

Since last week she has reverted to walking with a walking stick and many times she asks for our assistance even to walk for short distances.

If you have been thinking that you to visit mum, MAY I SUGGEST YOU DO IT SOON.

We are reverting to short visits and please ring before you plan to come. We appreciate your understanding because from experience we know what long visits do to mum's energy.

George has recovered in Hong Kong where he has been in hospital for a few days with Pneumonia and Laryngitis. He's trying to get an earlier flight to Melbourne - but no seats. He'll be here next Monday. He will go to Singapore for a few days. I tried to get him a direct flight down from Hong Kong - not possible. If you would like to send him a message his email is george@therowlandsfamily.com .

Mya's over her flu and luckily didn't infect mum (it was fun keeping a 5 year old confined to her bedroom!!). Loretta's back from an 8 day break. She looked after Mya on Friday afternoon, Saturday and Sunday so I could have a complete break. I attended a quilting workshop on Saturday and quilted till lunch time on Sunday. I'm going for a massage today because the stress is taking it's toll. I've got hard walnuts growing on my shoulders and the nerve impingement is causing pins and needles down my arms. It's true that carers have to look after themselves or else they can't look after the sick person.

Nick my nephew came yesterday and did a brilliant job cutting all the lawns – all those mundane things take second priority when your life fires more important issues to you to address. However the steady deterioration of things like the garden must be depressing for mum who kept an immaculate house and spectacular garden. Although she dispatched many of her pot plants to new homes when she got the diagnosis, the verandah is slowly looking as full with gifts of pot plants and the occasional irresistible purchase.

Nick and Mum had a wonderful time together. Thanks Nick for the gardening and the little break for me.

Our friends and neighbours of 37 years have died and their house has been sold. The new Japanese owners have rented to a South Korean family. One 9 year old girl Irene and her cousin 12 year old Jonny live there now. We met them last week - they are a delightful family. All the years we had a gate in the back fence we shared, and before the sale was completed, we had it bolted as we weren't sure who would be living there. and we didn't want strangers having access to our property. The fence was opened once again. We now call it THE FRIENDSHIP GATE.

Little letters go between the little hand opening. Invites, presents, a gorgeous little game of friendship.

I received this treasure the other day…

Hello Miranda

My name is Irene (I’m 9 years old) Of course I‘d love to come
and see your garden (If I may). Our family is from South Korea and it is
the FIRST time we have received a “Welcome to our neighbourhood card!” hee hee I
suddenly feel like a girl straight out of a book (Mind you, I love books and my
friends call me the bookworm). When I was little I wanted a nice house, a
beautiful garden, an apple tree and a dog for life!

Now I have it all, maybe not an apple, but I have a very kind neighbour!

I’m very sorry if you hear our dog bark at night, - it’s my dog – she’s only nice months old and very
stubborn. She’s used to sleep indoors with another person. SO please
excuse us!

From Jin (my mum) and me! (Irene)

Of course I’m a softie and reading such a bright hopeful dream, I immediately went to the nursery and bought her a Jonathan apple tree. She received it with such joy she and her cousin almost break it running back through the fence gate to show their mum. I quickly type the invite and rush to give it to them. Sooner than expected FOUR of them arrive. There are two more children Amy and Sarah. Here in Australia to learn English and returning next week to South Korea. We find the moon. We watch it slowly lose light, but soon it is bobbing in and out of clouds. We see enough to understand the process then retire inside. I prepare ice-cream with chocolate bars on top to keep them distracted during the wait for the total eclipse which is a hour away. The distraction lasts 10 minutes. Mya climbing the verandah railings precariously trying to get attention - getting too close for comfort for my liking and I have to send her to her room after the ninetieth time I asked her nicely to get down.

I share myself between the children and Mum giving them all equal attention. Mum is in bed after a shocking dizzy spell and headache. I teach them all Sudoku and they are all immediately enthralled with it. Four little bottoms poking towards the ceiling in various directions spellbound as they communally work out the intricacies of Sudoku puzzles. Mya in the meantime, a bit young for Sudoku, tries all sorts of hysterical antics to distract them and play with her. We return to the convivial laughter of children playing and enjoying discovering Mya’s thousands of possessions she has acquired in the 5 months we have been here. I’m in fits of laughter trying to hide my glee at the inventiveness of my daughter trying to attract the attention of older children who fortunately have acquired the puzzle skills and then start playing with my and the balloon. We pop out the front of the house intermittently to check the moon’s progress – mostly it’s hidden behind the clouds. They later run home in the dark through the friendship gate, full of shouts “the moon’s gone red, the moon’s gone read, thanks for a lovely night, thanks for being such a good neighbour, my mum said Mya can come over tomorrow night.” A few days later the two cousins who were living here temporarily, Amy and Sarah, in Australia to learn English, return home. The delightful Irene and Johnny invite Mya over for play dates. And we invite Kira the baby Border Collie over for pet therapy for mum.

Happy times. Memorable times. The stuff of life-long childhood memories.

There is a silver lining to every challenge in life. Mya coming to Australia has been the best thing for her. She has had a great school, I've had the time to teach her to read, she's developed lots of school friends and seen me interact with their parents in close friendships, and now she's learned the value of neighbourhood friendships. In Singapore Emma, John and Yuko were the only examples of this for us - that's why we treasure their friendship and look forward to going to see them in a couple of weeks time. I'm so grateful to the parents at Mya’s school and my friends Sue, Tony and Vicky. Last week when things got really bad and I couldn't leave mum at all, Viy took Mya to school for me in the morning, the next morning Margit a school mum picked her up from school, Pria another school mum took Mya after school for a play date and Jodie yet another school mum went out for a sanity coffee with me when mum was looked after by a carer. then Sue and tony let me stay at their house for some long awaited interruption-free night’s sleep while Loretta kindly looked after Mya.

Thanks everyone for coming to the rescue - this is the time you know the true value of good friends.

Thanks to those not close by, but who send their love through phone and emails to me. Mum is being prayed for by friends of almost every religion, so the Gods are with her. She's better this afternoon, able to go out for her blood tests. thanks.....